78 - I Am Zen

[5:30 PM]JON: Traffic jam going into the tunnel.  If Dot beats us there, tell her we’ll be home ASAP. 

Talk about trial by fire.  Playing hostess to the ex-wife definitely qualifies.

[5:32 PM]SHERIDAN: Ok.  How are you?

[5:35 PM]JON: Ready for Round 3.  You?

[5:35 PM]SHERIDAN: Doing great. 

And she was.  She felt highly accomplished since arriving back in New York.  A large suitcase full of her clothes, makeup and jewelry had been ferried over and put away in the master bedroom closet as per Jon’s instructions to “shove my shit to the side”.   Afterward, a quick nap had given her enough energy to take on the daunting task of more phone calls, which had gone much better than her first. 

Suzy had been overjoyed about her marriage announcement.  Surprised, to be sure, but once the initial shock wore off, Sheridan’s best friend was thrilled.  She went beyond thrilled to ecstatic when she found out about the baby, even going so far as to squeal with delight. 

It was strange when she realized Suzanne was the very first person to be immediately excited about the baby upon hearing the news.  Even while she was a tiny bit ashamed that she hadn’t been excited about her own baby, Suzy’s reaction made Sheridan’s stomach flutter with some queer sense of pride and elicited a secret little smile.  It was amazing what a little positive energy could do for one’s state of mind.

The silly sense of pride was enough to spur her directly into the next call with Riley.  Her sister had been quieter than Suzy when receiving the announcement, but proved to be just as supportive and happy for her sister – even when she found out about the baby. 

Cole, however, was not delighted by his new brother-in-law.

“Dammit, Sheri,” he groused.  “I was hoping this was a short fling, because Melissa has been obsessed with him since Christmas.  Now I’ve got to have this guy in the family?  Seriously?”

Once he looked past his own personal grief at the situation, he manged to be semi-enthusiastic in wishing Sheridan a lifetime of marital bliss.  Then he got her grinning with a wryly drawled, “Lotsa luck with parenthood though, little sister.” 

Three out of four positive phone calls today wasn’t too shabby.  She could live with it.  Hopefully, Jon had fared as well with his children.

And I hope we both fare as well with the ex.

On cue, the discreet chime of the arriving elevator resonated into the kitchen where she was fixing a cup of tea.  Taking a deep breath, she wiped her hands on the back of her jeans, ran a quick hand through her hair and pulled down the hem of her sweater.  She stepped around the corner to the foyer just as the elevator doors slid apart. 

“Dorothea,” she greeted the other woman with a perfunctory smile and nod before turning her attention to the boys.  “Hi, guys.  Good to see you again.”

They mumbled unintelligible, yet enthusiastic, greetings and scurried back to their shared bedroom, throwing their coats toward the closet as they went.

“Boys!”  Their mother’s I-mean-business voice had them both stopping in their tracks.  “Hang them up.”

“Thanks,” Sheridan murmured as the youngest Bongiovi males followed orders and then adopted  a more leisurely pace to the rear of the apartment.  “Jon is stuck in traffic, but I think he and Jesse should be here any minute.  Would you like something while you wait?  I was about to fix myself a cup of tea.”

Dorothea lifted a cattily arched eyebrow, but was able to censor her accompanying remarks and ordered herself to be nice.  In the grand scheme of things it wasn’t anything to her if this woman was alone in Jon’s apartment, fixing herself tea.  It was none of her business.

“That’s okay.  I’ll just wait in the living room.”

“Of course.  Make yourself comfortable.”  Sheridan pivoted back toward the kitchen as she waved in the general direction of the living room, nearly blinding Dorothea with the glare from her ring.  A second look identified the obnoxiously diamond-laden piece of jewelry as a wide band – a wedding band.

It was irrational, the way she couldn’t breathe.  But standing in the foyer of her apartment – the one she picked out with Jon – stood a Barbie doll.  That Barbie was smiling like she had every right to be there, making herself right at home while offering Dorothea tea or coffee and wearing a WEDDING RING. 

Maybe it wasn’t so irrational.

“Jesus.  He married you.”

We haven’t even been divorced for a year, the sonofabitch.

Barbie looked embarrassed for a split second before squaring her shoulders and meeting Dorothea’s eyes.  The new wife had green eyes.  Very green eyes. 

“Yes, he did.”

I know I shouldn’t be a bitch.  I know I shouldn’t.   Stephanie says the woman is fine and she’s been civil enough to me, if I forget the fact that she may have kicked over the Sambora Shitpot.

“Then I suppose congratulations are in order.”  She heard the flat, yet appropriate, response fall from her lips and was appreciative that she possessed some kind of basic, ingrained manners.  “I think I’ll just be on my way.  Tell Jon that – “

Just as she was about to make her escape and go have a stiff drink, the elevator doors parted to admit her oldest son and her…  Jon. 

Dorothea couldn’t help herself.  The first thing she did was let her gaze drop to his left hand, where she found exactly what she had been looking for yet didn’t want to find.  A thick, white-gold band sat on his thick ring finger in place of the yellow-gold that had resided there only months ago. 

She had regained the ability to breathe, thankfully.  The debilitating wave of shock had receded, but now she was furious.  Hurt and furious that he’d moved on so definitively in such a short time, while she hadn’t been on the first date.

How was that fair??

“Dottie.”  He attempted to lean in and greet her with a kiss to the cheek, but she avoided it, side-stepping into the elevator. 

“I’m in a hurry, Jon.  We’ll have to talk later.”

Their son quietly disappeared through the living room while Jon’s jaw went hard as concrete.  She’d seen it go rigid like that at least a million times before.  It meant he was a man on a mission and wouldn’t stop until that mission was completed to his own personal satisfaction.

”Dorothea, this can’t wait.  It’s about the boys.”

She blinked several times, not comprehending what he’d said.  The boys?  What about them?  What did they have to do with his big marriage announcement?  Whatever it was, she would have to stay and listen.

Dammit to hell…

Resentfully burying both her anger and her hurt, she nodded and re-entered the foyer.   “Alright.”

“I’ll go finish putting some things away,” Barbie – Sheridan – excused herself with a polite smile and vanished into the kitchen, leaving the former spouses to hang their coats and find seats on the two adjoining sofas.

Having no interest in exchanging pleasantries or staying here a minute longer than necessary, she cut directly to the chase.  “What about the boys, Jon?”

He squirmed restlessly, shifting his legs and his eyes because he’d never been able to sit still, even in high school.  Wiggling and squirming just like their youngest two boys did now, he said, “Sheridan and I got married yesterday.”

“I know.”

His head snapped up and a frown creased between his eyebrows.  “How?”

“I saw her wedding ring,” she informed him flatly.  “What does that have to do with the boys?”

“Oh.”  He went back to looking at a point on the far wall.  That was one of his most irritating habits.  He got stuck on whatever  pre-rehearsed script he was trying to recall and wouldn’t look whomever he was talking to in the eye.  It meant he had something very specific to say and he wasn’t sure how it was going to be received.  “Well, I talked to Dr. Rennicke and she suggested that you should probably be on board with the news before I tell the boys.  You know how Romeo’s been lately and there’s more than just the marriage to tell them.”

“More?”  An eerie feeling of premonition settled into the center of her stomach.  Surely not...

“We’re, uh, having a baby, too.”

This time there was no censoring anything.  Her attic of repressed impulses was full to the brim and she couldn’t hold any more.

“A baby?”  Because once wasn’t enough she leaned forward and hissed it into his face.  “A baby?  You have got to be the biggest fucking idiot alive, John Francis Bongiovi. She’s got your number and she used it to trap you into marriage by getting pregnant.   Now I’m more convinced than ever that she’s the one responsible for spilling Richie’s dirty little secret.   What the hell have you done?  What the hell are you exposing our kids to?”

"Don’t-"

The beginnings of his furious protest were overridden by the wedding-ringed hand of his new bride falling heavy on his shoulder as she slipped up behind him.  Sheridan’s green eyes made every effort to slice Dorothea to ribbons, even as her tone was quiet and cordial. 

“I don’t have to defend myself to you, Dorothea, and I won’t.  I’ve spent enough time defending myself to people whose opinions matter to me.  All you need to know is that your children will be well cared for when they’re in our home.  Everything else is irrelevant.”

Dorothea’s mouth pursed with barely contained fury as she pushed to her feet and addressed Jon instead of Barbie Bongiovi.  “If you think I’m leaving my boys here, you’ve lost your mind.  Come visit them all you want at the house.  By yourself.”

Jon threw off Sheridan’s hand as he sprang from the couch, fury boiling in the darkened blue depths of his eyes.  “Don’t start shit you can’t finish, Dot.  They’re my boys, too and they will come to stay with me.  With us.”

“Not today they won’t.”  She raised her voice loud enough for the neighbors who lived two buildings over to hear.  “Boys!  Get out here, right now!”

Latching onto her forearm, Jon prevented her from stalking past him and quietly growled, “Would you fucking listen to yourself?  You used to respect me and you know – you know – I’m not going to let anything happen to my babies.  Go home, Dottie.  Go get drunk, go get laid, go smoke a joint.  Meditate.  Whatever the hell will get you calm enough to see reason, but you’re not taking the kids with you.”

“You have new babies to worry about now,” she spat in his face.  “I’ll take care of my babies.  Just like I always have.”

“I’m not fucking kidding here.” The boy she’d once loved was an angry, angry man whose countenance was harder than the slew of diamonds on his new wife’s finger.  “This can be as pleasant or as ugly as it has to be.  Lawyers, police, whatever the fuck you wanna do, but the kids are staying with me for the weekend.  I’ll bring them back to you on Sunday, just like we planned.”

He wouldn’t dare!

But did she really want to push that far?  They had these kids for the rest of their lives.  Did she want to demolish their entire parenting relationship with a single snap decision that might have just a hint of illogical emotion behind it?   Was this woman worth it?

He’s an idiot with women.  Other than that, he’s always been responsible.

“No matter how you feel about me,” Sheridan intruded quietly on her thoughts.  “Jon’s children are a priority to him and that makes them my priority, too.  Their best interest will always come first.”

Goddamn you, don’t be nice.  Don’t be understanding.  I don’t NEED understanding from a mid-life crisis rebound wife who probably won’t last through an entire tour.

“Mom?”  Jake came meandering into the living room in his socked feet, a quizzical frown affixed to the face that was a miniature replica of Jon’s.  Romeo trailed right behind him.  “What’s wrong?”

Anger, confusion, annoyance, hurt, pride tumbled through her mind, spurring  a chaotic jumble of thoughts as she tried to find the right answer for Jacob’s question.  She wanted to take her kids and run.  She wanted to hide them away and hide with them, where this ridiculousness didn’t exist. 

It had been her who asked for the divorce.  Jon should still be suffering a little from that, dammit!  He sure as hell shouldn’t have moved on to ‘happily ever after’ already and Barbie shouldn’t have enticed him to do so.  She had to have some kind of ulterior motives, didn’t she??

I need to get myself together.  I’m not a vindictive, hysterical bitch.  I am Zen.  I have inner peace.  They can only steal that from me if I allow it.

Schooling her features into an impassive mask, she ignored Barbie and nodded stoically to Jon.  “Have a seat guys.  Your father and I have something to tell you…”

Look for a bonus post this weekend!  ;o)